Gawrshhhh lamaaaaa gilaaaa tak bukak blog ni =.= hah, bersawang *shooh shooh* *halau spiders*

Things happened like tonsssss of things. But I didn't have the time to post a few words into this blog cause I've been busy action-ing in the real life.
It's so funny, I'm moving on like very far ahead now. But still, I can't accept anyone else into my life. And I still can't get the CURIOUS thing in my head. I will always, always want to know the what, why, when, where, when it comes to him. I've tried, to not care. But I just do, you know?

For these past couple months, I've been trying to accept someone new. I act like I don't care whoever he is, or where is he come from, I just want to move on. Then I realized, I can't.
You can't force yourself to move on, or to accept someone else. You just can't. Humans do adapt, but hey, it needs time. So, I left the new guy, cause I just can't. I feel sick just to think about it. I couldn't pretend any longer. I don't care, I just want to be freeeeeeeeeeeee ~

I just still can't believe that I blew him away that night. I was panicked, and mad because he was attacking me like that, well kind of. And I just panicked, and didn't know what to do, and I just wanted to scream and shout and make everybody leaves that night. I let my ego take over me. I couldn't accept him just because I was still hurting. I didn't want him to feel like,
"Yeah she's easy. I hurt her, and I can come back whenever I want and she'll accept me back."
I just couldn't. So I decided to make him left me that night.

When I opened this blog, I still can see my first post. And that was the last post of him. The "Always Be You" post. And I just couldn't delete that, cause it's true. Whatever happens, he's always gonna be my special person. I will always be there for him whenever he needs me in the future. For me, he's not only an Ex, he's the first boy who makes me feel loved and special. He's my first love. And I still keep my words, no matter what happen, I'm here for him. I'm sorry that I hurt him and didn't accept him back when he came to me when I know that I'll be happy only with him. I just want him to learn, that's all. Nothing is easy. It's not easy for me too. I just couldn't accept him back for now. However, I'm glad that he moved on. So happy for him to do that, so proud of him. He can do the thing that I've been keep trying to do for months now.

For now, I'm fine. I know there's still a lot of time, still have many things to do, and I'm happy of making friends for now. I'm trying to be better, positive. Hergh hergh hergh, I'm one silly girl ~("."~)
Have you look at Demi Lovato's new hair? Hewhewhewhew~

Omnomnomnom cute huh? :3 Gonna keep my hair just like that hiu hiu hiu hiu :3

This is for you girls out there, you need to understand this about men :)
"Girls need to realize : We guys don't care if you talk to other guys. We don't care if you're friends with other guys. But when you're sitting next to us , and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him , without even introducing us , yeah , it pisses us off. It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there. We don't care if a guy calls OR text you , but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned. Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it can't wait till the morning. Also , when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/ stunning , we freaking mean it. Don't tell us we're wrong. We'll stop trying to convince you. The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence. Yeah , you can quote me. Don't be mad when we hold the door open. Take Advantage of the mood i'm in. Let us pay for you! Don't 'feel bad'. We enjoy doing it. It's expected. Smile and say 'thank you'. Kiss us when no one's watching. If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking , we'll be more impressed. You don't have to get dressed up for us. If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of makeup you own. We like you for who you are and not what you are. Honestly, i think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's. or my tshirt and boxers, not all dolled up. Don't take everything we say seriously. Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it. Don't get angry easily. Stop using magazines/ media as your bible. Don't talk about how hott Chris Brown, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us. It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that. Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful' i'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with 'Hey handsome!' instead of 'Hey baby/ stud/cutie/ sexy' or whatever else you can think of. On the other hand i'm not sayin i wouldnt like it either. Girls , I cannot stress this enough : if you aren't being treated right by a guy , dont wait for him to change! Ditch his sorry butt , disgrace to the male population and find someone who will treat you with utter respect. Someone who will honor your morals. Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest. Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes. Someone who will love you , no matter how bad you make them feel. Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes and say 'i love you' and actually mean it. Every Guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this. Life is too short to complain about everything that comes your way so stop and smell the roses in life because you might never have another time to take it , so take your time because they are all different in every way , so take chances in life , if it doesn't work out then fine , there are always more roses to smell. I hope girls out there will understand this correctly."

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